The Brother (and Sister) Hood of Musicians and Staff

There's no doubt that playing music for four hours a night - on average - is difficult work. You push your physical, mental, emotional and creative limits - while keeping the crowd interested, excited and entertained. Still, if you do it right it's pretty cool. You end up with a full tip jar, a gracious and thankful club owner/corporate event planner and the ultimate high - a night of creating great music with other musicians.

So, we get the applause, the accolades, the money, etc. But you know who REALLY deserves a pat on the back? The people working for you non-stop, all night - the staff of the club/restaurant/hotel.

Sometimes, we're all too deep in our own heads to see how hard the waiter/waitress/bartender is working. I'm proud to say I've never fallen into that trap - at 15 I was a busboy, a thankless job if there ever was one - so I know how hard these people work. So, in my band, I've asked - scratch that, DEMANDED - that the musicians who play with me never disparage the support staff. I make sure to shout out, multiple times per set, to take care of these people with tips - or just be nice to them.

Here's how a typical evening goes at a club for these fine people: they don't get breaks, especially if the club is pumping. They're on their feet ALL NIGHT LONG. Hell, even musicians get a 15-minute break every hour.They deal, up close and personal, with clients who sometimes drink too much and become obnoxious. They drag heavy trays full of beers, drinks appetizers, etc., through a crowded sea of humanity - and do it without spilling a drop. They have to move, FAST, because you want that drink RIGHT NOW...and everybody else does, too. Meanwhile, your bartender has to have an encyclopedic knowledge of every drink known to man. He or she has to mix your drinks fast and clean while also serving as your spiritual guide, shrink, conscience and best friend.

I've been fortunate enough to make good, solid friendships with a few waiters/waitresses, bartenders, cooks, etc. at some of the clubs on rotation for my band. These people are just downright COOL. They get it - smile whether you want to or not. Work hard, deliver the goods, smile some more, keep walking even though your legs and knees feel like they're made of glass shards and splinters and then smile again. So, in many ways I feel a real kinship with the support staff. I mean, we're both being paid by the same people. We're both providing service to people who need things.

Finally, my motivation for this blog came from something that happened two weeks ago. I was out to dinner with a friend, and this wonderful woman - who, week in and out, sells flowers to the patrons at every club I perform at - came into the area where we were eating. I gave her a hug, she gave me a big smile. I asked her if she was moving lots of "buds," and she laughed and told me friend "he is the NICEST guy." After she left, my friend said "this isn't the first time someone working at a club has told me how nice you are."

I didn't tell you that to make me look great, or like some kind of saint. I told you that because these people work HARDER than most of us ever will, and it doesn't take much to make them feel good. Take care of them - tip them a bit extra, tell them something nice, find out their first names and USE them. Be kind to them. Appreciate what they're doing, and the circumstances in which they're doing it.

It'll come back to you tenfold, and - believe me - it'll stay with them for a long, long time.